Flow.

People are real.

They have feelings and everything that is said and done to a human being in a day impact upon them for either the positive or the negative.

People carry those impacts with them and they begin to form the person they are.

People are not cattle to climb over on your way to the top, to use and abuse to make sure you stand in the spotlight. They are not disposable. Friending them when you don't care about what happens to them or that they are happy is disgusting. Playing at love and intimacy when it is just a game to you is even worse.

Everyone wants to be loved and to feel that they belong. Everyone likes to feel valued and recognized and people have a right to be supported to find that for themselves. We do not MAKE other people. We might be lucky enough to share a part of their journey. We might be lucky enough to even play the role of a teacher or a mentor for a small part of that journey but the wisest teacher recognizes that he, above all else, is a student and that he learns far more from the people he teaches than he ever imparts to them.

Why Did God Let This Happen?

God.  Let's discuss. 

Those of you with a closed mind or who are already rabid (check the foaming at the mouth) should walk away from their computers and go watch The Price is Right.

Have heard this a lot lately, "How could there be a God when there is so much unhappiness and misery in the world.  Look at all the horrific things happening.  If he really existed he would do something about it."  Now that's not a new statement, I have heard it all my life and I am pretty sure so did my grandparents and their grandparents ... although we certainly have a whole lot more misery going on in the world these days.

Religion is NOT what I am talking about here and I really do not want to get into an argument about your religion.  No need to get defensive.  You do you and I will do me.  I am talking about God ... however you define him, in your context. 

This is not an article to convince the unbelievers that they should believe in God.  It is just an explanation of how the question asked above is answered by me.

Life is cause and effect.  Laws exist.  Whether they be of nature or of man, when you break laws there are consequences. 

Pendulums of Popular Practices.

In My lifetime alone I have watched the pendulum swing back and forth several times on what "they " tell us is the right thing to do.  "They" being the researchers, scientists, doctors, politicians ,teachers, lawyers, exercise guru's, nutritionists, great great aunts, the women in the basement of the church, the know-it-alls and the religious aficionado's.

"They" are always telling us what to do and how to do it and when to do it.

Eat this, don't eat it, sorry you are going to die now.  Take this, don't take this, sue the people who made you take this.  This causes this, this causes that, this is your only chance at survival.  We need more of this, we need less of this, too late we have legislated your ass in our sling.  Jail them, unjail them, not our problem.  Love them, hate them, there is no God anyway.  It happened this way, it happened that way, can someone hand us a flashlight, we've lost our asses.  Nurture, nature, shoot them.  Too Hot, Too Cold, we are all going to die now. 

Gold Medal Lives.

I once bounced a basketball hard off the floor and onto the wall of the gymn so that it flew and swished into the  basket at the other end.

 

I must have had on my superman tights at the time because I was never able to repeat it.

 I could spend the rest of my life telling everyone that story over and over, of my great accomplishment. It sounds even better if I leave out the bit that I tried repeatedly to do it again and never succeeded.    It was really quite spectacular regardless,  and I got a fair bit of mileage out of it at the time.  But the years have moved on and so have I and all the people who were once impressed.  I am sure some of them have moved so far on as to completely forget about my mind blowing accomplishment.  In a lifetime of living it was an amazing thing, but hardly worthy of holding up to everyone I meet in an effort to impress them of who I am and what I can accomplish.  It is simply something I did  once.   

Be The Person You Are.

 

I told my kids that all the time.  "Just be who you are.  There is no-one else like you."  You have to be you and let other people be themselves.  Wise words, but like many wise words when spoken repeatedly by a parent to a teenager with headphones on ... they usually sound more like "blah blah blah."  The problem is what does that even mean?  And if you get what it means ... how do you do it?

 

We have a ton of nifty sayings and advice out there  but not so much on the practical application.

It starts with honesty, and honesty is irrelevant unless you can be honest with yourself.  Being honest with yourself is that you choose and do things that are in keeping with what you like and are comfortable with.  It means that you don't change who you are from moment to moment and person to person.

 

We all know the person who, when they are with us, are sincere in their actions and words. They mean it.  BUT ... When they walk down the block and into another person's house they are equally sincere with actions and words.  The problem is that THOSE actions and words contradict everything they just did with you.  Some people live more than a duality, they live multiple personalities that they exchange like outfits, depending where they are going.  It might seem the obvious natural consequences to this kind of behaviour is a lack of friends eventually ... because these people do end up betraying their "friends" over and over again ... but it is worse than that.  These people never really come to understand who they are.  They are anchored to nothing in themselves.  They don't know who they are, or what they want, except to be liked in the moment. 

The Ultimate and Final Truth.

Yesterday I watched and listened as Julia Gillard, Prime Minister of Australia, apologized to victims of forced adoption.   See news report and video here.

I was so moved to see so many moms and dads and stolen children in the audience, the pain of that law written on their faces as the camera panned the auditorium where the speech was delivered.    It is pretty hard to believe that something like that even happened, let alone so recently in this countries history.  (some people claim it was still being enforced at times as late as the 80's).

Breaking Free, Letting Go.

 

How the heck do you "break free" or "let go?"  We hear the phrases and see everyone else reaching towards the enlightenment  rung of the human experience but HOW?

There are some really practical realizations that can help.

As a child we are completely impressionable from birth to age 6.  We accept everything our parents tell us and are moulded and shaped by our communities, cultures and families.  Seeds are planted and nourished.

 

As we grow those plants are continually watered with experiences that are repetitive in their message.  If those messages are negative we grow them as diligently as we do the positives.  There is no weeding of this garden when you are a child.

 We come to understand that we are "stupid," "ugly" or "not loved."   We have people who deliver those  "truths" to us.  Our experiences reflect those teachings.  We step into the role.